Full Steam Ahead!

So, as I sit here..unable to sleep because my sleep schedule is all fucked up again (my fault as usual), I have so many things on my mind (of course, isn't that how it always works?)

When riding in the car tonight on our way to grab various items for our needy hands, I had a certain kind of realization that tends to come at the most random of times, but remains truthful beyond your own realization until after you really think about it.

People don't always agree with me, nor do they think I've made the right choices in life, but I'm happy.
And I'm happy because no matter what happens in my life....anytime I want something I go after it.

I can't stand just sitting around and whining about how you want something but can't have it. Why? There are so many options and paths you can take, why not go for what you want? You can make it happen if you try hard enough or go about it the right way.

It seems like everything I've wanted in my life, after a bit of hard work and determination (not to mention a willingness to talk to people) has happened.

I wanted to get a job at this place, it happened..
I wanted to go to this school, it happened.
I wanted this boy, it happened.
I wanted to learn how to do this, I taught myself.
I wanted to model, it happened.
I wanted to dance. It happened.
I wanted to completely alter my life and move it from one state to another...it happened.

And now I'm reaching another crossroads within my life where I know what I want...but this journey in getting there is most likely going to be the most difficult one yet.

Some people think I'm silly and I'm just young. But isn't that the whole point? You only have one life to live (that you can be sure of, you pagan freaks) so you might as well make it interesting for yourself. Do what makes you happy.

It might take a little time and effort, but what else do you have?

So, in the next year and a half, Sam and I are looking to some pretty major changes. In the mean time, we intend on preparing our lives and future careers as much as possible.

Full steam ahead, I say! As we prepare for our next journey. :)

<3

Time to Improve!!

I must confess, in the past couple of months with all the changes and things going on; the lack of stress to my job, my feeling more secure and stable, and several other factors, I have fallen off the nutrition wagon.

If anyone knows me, you know that I literally check every label on something before I eat it. I'm always checking the ingredients and nutrition information, not just to keep track of it, but because I simply enjoy knowing what I'm putting in my body. Lately, however, with all the new foods and treats at my finger tips, I have gained a habit of snacking on those instead of having a well balanced meal when it comes time to eat. Granted, I don't gorge myself every day, but 3 servings of Sunchips can be just as bad for you as half a candy bar. It's just simply things that I should not be taking into my body on a daily basis.

Now, before you all get all bent out of shape with my "being so hard on myself" (because that is not the first time I've heard this), keep in mind that just because that isn't how you eat, doesn't mean it's how I want to. Having a balanced diet is an extremely important factor in my personal wellbeing. It makes me feel good. I function at my best when I am healthy and eating right.

Now, back to my original point.

I really came down to this, not only this past week, but this morning when I did my weigh-in. Normally, I weigh around 141 in the mornings, but after the past couple of weeks, I weighed in at 146. This was the deciding factor for me, because not only does 5 lbs have a great affect on my every day functioning, but I worked extensively to get my weight down from the 198 it was years ago, and I am not going to allow myself to fall back into that pit. I worked way too hard.

The main issues I am going to address in the coming weeks are my diet at work as well as my diet at night. I have a tendancy to not eat as much early in the day, and progressively eat more and more as the day goes on. Maybe that is because my lack of nutrients begins to catch up with me at night?

But my decision as of now is to pack a lunch for work each day.

A protein, a carb, a fruit and a veggie.

Now, I also know that the only way that I will do this is if it's simple things that don't require heating. With the shifts I work and lack of break, heating and a large amount of set aside time for a lunch is just not ideal. So here are some options I've come up with

Cheese and crackers

protein bar

baby carrots (w/ranch)

celery (w/ peanut butter or hummus)

apple (w/peanut butter)

banana

100 calorie packs

veggie chips

And some days I can easily throw together a wrap to take in if I want something like that (always a good summer option)

For right now, I feel like this is a good list to build off of. I can mix and match according to whatever I want that day and the previous guide.

As far as my night snacking, I'm putting an end to that. After 9, no more heavy carbs. If anything at all, I can grab a fruit, a veggie, or have a glass of soy milk.

It's always the best feeling ever to take control of your bad habits and change them to improve your lifestyle. :)

<3